Liturgy | Harriet Connor

Good Friday is the day when Christians worldwide pause to remember the crucifixion of our Saviour Jesus. Traditionally it’s a day of mourning. So how did it start? And why do we call it ‘good’?

The history of the day

In the first three centuries of the Church, Jesus’ death and resurrection were remembered together in a shorter celebration of Easter. The early Christians held one all-night vigil in the lead up to a service of communion at dawn on the Sunday.

Gradually, Easter began to take the form that it does today, spread out over a whole week—’Holy Week’—from Palm Sunday through to Maundy Thursday, Good Friday and then Easter Sunday. The idea of the week-long celebration is that Christians enter into the journey of Jesus, taking time to remember the various events of his final week.

The date of Easter changes because it is calculated in relationship to the cycles of the moon (following Passover, the Jewish festival during which Jesus died). Easter Day falls on the first Sunday after the full moon that follows March 20 (which used to be the date of the Equinox). So Good Friday always falls between March 20 and April 23. If your older children are interested in astronomy, they can read more about this complicated astronomical calculation.

Good Friday has always been a sombre day for Christians to reflect on the sacrificial death of their Lord. Most churches hold a reflective service, traditionally without the celebration of communion. The sombre mood is often expressed in churches being kept bare of any decorations and having music that is more subdued (in some traditions, without the organ).

The name of the day

In other cultures, the day is named differently. In German it is called ‘sorrowful’ Friday, and in Scandinavian languages (and Old English), ‘long Friday’, due to the length of traditional church services. In Romance languages, it is called ‘Holy Friday’ and in Greek it is called ‘the Holy and Great Friday’.

It is this final sense of the word that is carried by the English term ‘Good Friday’. According to the Oxford English Dictionary, ‘good’ in this context refers to ‘a day or season observed as holy by the church’.

So, the first thing we can tell our children is that the meaning of Good Friday is ‘Great’ or ‘Special’ Friday.

The goodness of the day

But there is more we can say. Since at least the late nineteenth century, Christian parents have been explaining to their children that Good Friday is good because that is the day when Jesus died to save us from our sins and give us eternal life. On that day, God turned humanity’s worst evil—executing the innocent Son of God—into our greatest good—salvation for all who believe in him.

This was possible because Jesus chose to go to the cross; he willingly took the penalty for our sins, enduring condemnation and separation from God so that we don’t have to. Yes, Jesus was killed. But he also ‘laid down his life’ for us. He said, ‘I have authority to lay it down and authority to take it up again’ (John 10:18). As we explain Jesus’ death to our children, we can reassure them that Jesus wasn’t just a powerless victim. We can remind them of what Jesus said to his disciples when they wanted to fight against his arrest:

‘Do you think I cannot call on my Father, and he will at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels? But how then would the Scriptures be fulfilled that say it must happen in this way?’ (Matthew 26:53–4)

This Easter, let’s tell our children that Good Friday is a sad day. It is right to mourn the suffering and death that Jesus faced. But it is also a good day, because it marks the day when Jesus set us free from our sins by his blood and opened up the gates of heaven to all who believe in him.

This article originally appeared at Growing Faith, a Christian online magazine for parents. Find out more about Growing Faith and subscribe to our monthly e-newsletter here.

References

‘Who, What, Why: Why is Good Friday called Good Friday?’ BBC Magazine.

‘Good Friday’, Britannica.

‘Passiontide and Holy Week’, Church of England.

‘Calculate the Date of Easter Sunday’, Astronomical Society of South Australia.

During extended periods of lockdown, it’s easy to slip into what I call ‘calendar freefall’—when each day starts to blend and blur into the next, and weeks pass without me even opening my diary. In lockdown it’s hard even to remember what day it is.

When our time is unstructured, it’s easy to fall out of good habits. When we’re not going anywhere, we forget to brush our teeth in the morning. When there are no bells ringing, we forget to stop for morning tea. When we don’t have sports training, we forget to exercise.

This can happen in our spiritual lives too. When we’re not going to church or Bible study, we can go for days without stopping to pray or open up the Bible.

We were made for routine

The truth is that human beings need routine—it’s woven into the very fabric of creation. God made the world in a rhythmical way: he created in six days—each with evening and morning—then rested on the seventh. God also the built into creation the means for marking time: ‘Let there be lights in the expanse of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark seasons and days and years’ (Genesis 1:14). We’re not designed to live in ‘calendar freefall’.

Routines are important because they don’t just shape the days—they also shape us. The things we do repeatedly, every day or every week, become part of who we are and how we see the world.

Have you ever noticed how athletes take on different physical shapes depending on the sport they practise? If you walked through the Olympic Athletes’ Village, you’d be able to tell the swimmers from the weightlifters, the basketballers from the marathon runners, the archers from the gymnasts. The things we repeat shape who we become, both physically and spiritually.

A Christian daily routine

This lockdown, I wanted to develop a routine to remind me to look to God each day. I also wanted to use this time to help our children to grow in their faith. Drawing on our rich Anglican heritage, I have found a way to do both of these things at once.

In our family we have started using the ancient Christian practice of saying Morning and Evening Prayer (also called the Daily Office) together as a way of shaping our days and ourselves. We say Morning Prayer around the breakfast table, and Evening Prayer sitting on our bed (if we’re not too tired). On Sundays we have a short ‘Family Church’ service of Morning Prayer in the living room.

Our children range in age from twelve down to one, so these daily times of worship are never completely focused or uninterrupted. And we sometimes have to skip over some parts of the service when things are too chaotic. But here are four reasons why I want to persevere with this lockdown routine.

(At the end of this article you can download the services of Morning and Evening Prayer for families that I have compiled.)

Harriet Connor

Author of Big Picture Parents

Tag: Liturgy

Mum/dad, why do we call it Good Friday?