In Australia, where I live, school has just gone back for another year. The memories of the Summer holidays are fading fast, and we’re busy stocking our children’s backpacks with empty folders and notebooks. By the end of the year, those folders and books—and with them our children—will come home full of learning.

As the term begins, I’ve been reflecting on the respective roles that parents and schools play in the education of our children.

In our modern era, we are in the habit of outsourcing our children’s education to others. We see learning as an impersonal transaction—we engage schools, tutors and programs to teach our children then send them home. Home has become a place purely for relaxation and recreation; a place to recover from all of the learning done elsewhere.

But the more I read the Bible, the more convinced I am that the one image that captures the role of a parent better than any other is that of the teacher. It is parents, not schools, who bear the primary responsibility for their children’s education. Every home is a school. Every parent is a teacher.

Our eldest son was recently given a Rubiks cube as a gift (admittedly at my suggestion). My first reaction was to send him off with permission to look up some “how-to” videos on YouTube. I assumed that the online experts could show him some simple “hacks” and tricks. To be honest, I was just hoping it would keep him busy for a while—that he wouldn’t need any help from me.

But a few minutes later came the familiar call: “Mum … Can you help me?”

It quickly became clear that if our son was going to master the cube, I would have to walk alongside him. Somewhat reluctantly, I agreed to help. We downloaded the official solution guide and, over the course of a few hours, saw the chaos of coloured squares gradually fall into line.

Solving a Rubiks cube is hardly a necessary life skill. But the incident helped me to recognise that when it comes to teaching our children, I have a bad habit of deferring to others. Often I’m too busy or too tired to do the slow and repetitive work of teaching, so I look around for a quick and easy alternative. Instead of teaching my kids to tie their shoelaces, I buy them Velcro shoes.

I recently read an interesting book by psychologist Dr Andrew Fuller about how parents can “unlock” their children’s potential.  Dr Fuller emphasises that we parents are our children’s first and most important teachers. He writes:

Teachers and schools do their best for children but their impact is extended over many students at a time. Schools are constrained by guidelines and budgets … Children spend only between 10 and 15 per cent of their time at school. They spend more time asleep (33 per cent) than they do at school. The rest of their time (52 per cent) is at home, awake, mucking around, playing and learning about life. It’s what they do with that time that makes the most significant impact on their development. The people who can most powerfully unlock a child’s genius are the people who play with them, spend the most time with them and love them the most—you. (Unlocking Your Child’s Genius, p7)

Not That Kind of Teacher

When I say that parents are “teachers” to their children, don’t think of desks and worksheets. Think of a tradesman with his apprentice, or a Rabbi with his disciples. That’s the kind of “teacher” we meet in the Bible. These teachers make a long-term investment in their apprentices, passing on all the knowledge and skills their apprentices will need to become practitioners in their own right. They don’t just teach with words, but also through demonstration. Their apprentices don’t just listen, but also practise what they are taught. In the apprenticeship model, learning is personal, learning is practical, and learning is a process.

As parents, we want our children to graduate from their “apprenticeship” of childhood having reached both physical and spiritual maturity. Our aim is to equip them with all the skills they will need for life as an adult. But more importantly, we want to equip our children with the knowledge of God, and their place within his world. To put it another way, parenting is about helping our children to know and live out their true human purpose: to honour God, work his creation, and love other people. The curriculum we teach covers theology, life skills and ethics.

While parents are ultimately responsible for their children’s education, there are times when we involve other people in their learning. We partner with our children’s school teachers; with music teachers or sports coaches; with grandparents, aunts and uncles; with the children’s ministry leaders at church. We are our children’s primary teachers, but we don’t have to teach them alone.

Jesus, the Son

We don’t usually look to an unmarried, childless man for advice about parenting. But you can’t talk about teachers without talking about the Teacher, Jesus.

It is interesting that even Jesus underwent his own period of childhood apprenticeship. Firstly, Jesus was raised by his earthly parents, Mary and Joseph. It astounds me to think that God would entrust his precious only Son into the hands of human parents! As faithful Jews, Mary and Joseph taught Jesus God’s word in the Old Testament; they included him in the ceremonies and festivals of Israel; they took him to the synagogue and taught him how to read and pray; they taught him the ways of the sky and the land, the birds and the flowers. And Joseph also taught Jesus the craft of carpentry—how to shape God’s creation into something of purpose and beauty.

Besides his apprenticeship in humanity, Jesus was also an apprentice to his heavenly Father. As Jesus said to his critics:

‘My Father is always at his work to this very day, and I too am working.’ For this reason they tried all the more to kill him; not only was he breaking the Sabbath, but he was even calling God his own Father, making himself equal with God.

Jesus gave them this answer: ‘Very truly I tell you, the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does. For the Father loves the Son and shows him all he does.’ (John 5:17-20)

Jesus, the Teacher

Jesus had no children, but he took on a group of apprentices—the Twelve Disciples. Jesus walked beside them showing and teaching them the ways of God. The disciples were slow learners, but their Teacher patiently led them on towards greater understanding, greater faith, and greater responsibility. He trained his disciples, letting them try and fail, until finally they were ready to take over his mission on earth, with the empowering of his Spirit.

Jesus described the process of an apprenticeship like this: “The student is not above the teacher, but everyone who is fully trained will be like their teacher.” (Luke 6:40) Jesus underlined this message shortly before his death, when he served his disciples by washing their feet. Then he said, “You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord’, and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet.” (John 13:13-14)

Becoming Better Teachers

So how can we parents become better teachers to our children—our apprentices?

Firstly, we need to make learning personal. Take responsibility for your children’s spiritual, practical and moral education. Decide on what knowledge, skills and values they will need when they “graduate” as adults and regularly assess their progress. If you don’t have the knowledge or skills yourself, you can either get educated, or get help.

Develop a positive partnership with your children’s school. Get to know the teachers and find out what they are teaching throughout the year.

And remember—your students will become like their teacher, so work hard to practise what you preach.

Secondly, we can make learning practical. Don’t just teach with words, but through demonstration. Give your children the chance to practise new skills until they master them. When you’re at home, don’t just entertain your kids, but train them in chores and life skills.

Thirdly, see learning as a process. Be patient: learning a new skill takes a lot of time and repetition.  And don’t overschedule your week: if you’re too busy or too tired to teach your children, then it’s probably time to reassess your commitments.

As Christian parents, our aim is to be able to say to our children: “Follow my example as I follow the example of Christ.” (1 Corinthians 11:1)